Thursday, October 14, 2010

The scariest thing I've seen this Halloween. or maybe ever.

First off,
I will give you the link...
(there is no way in hell I'm posting the video on my blog.)
click here to see the scariest commercial EVER!
I had a panic attack just looking up that damn video clip.
Yeah, you're welcome.

I jumped about ten feet in the air when I saw this commercial last night.
I didn't know or care what they were advertising.
However, I know now that I will never EVER buy Bridgestone tires. A**holes.

People think it's funny, but it's not.
It's an effing whale...on land! Wait, not just on land, but in a car!
Dude, a whale could fit in my VAN! Now instead of fearing hobos in my van,
I'm going to be thinking a freakin Orca is waiting for me in the back seat.
This has gone way too far.

Adding lemon juice to a paper cut, 
my roommate decided to play a fun little prank on me today.
I hopped on my husband's PC after work because I was too lazy to find my laptop.
I was just sitting there, all la-la-la happy as a clam,
when suddenly this HUGE close up picture of that bastard Shamu popped up as the wallpaper.
Mouth open and tongue curled, basically ready to bite my head off.

I couldn't get away from that computer fast enough. 
I screamed like an ax murderer was chasing me.
And then I just stood there, my back facing the computer,
peeing my pants laughing at the ridiculousness of it all.

Our roommate is finding a new place to live tomorrow.


  1. LOL I really shouldn't be laughing this hard! I know what it's like to fear something that much. But I love me some Orcas. They are my favorite animal. I imagine that picture of Shamu and want to squee at the cuteness. But that is a cruel prank. If someone posted a picture of a dirigible as my wallpaper, I would pretty much just die right there.

  2. I lubs you bestie!!
    You tell the roommate to behave, or else I'm sending a tranny Elvi to take him out. Mess with jelly and you mess with the peanut butter.
    Question: Did you save one of the grenade launchers? Just keep it under your front seat in case of random Shamu attacks. Those bastards wouldn't stand a chance!

  3. I about died when I read you labeled this "whales can suck it" hahahahaha

  4. Did you know that a full grown adult human can stand in a whale's vagina? Yes, they are that big. You are welcome.

  5. Has anyone ever told you how funny you are? If not, let me. YOU ROCK! I was dying reading this.


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