Wednesday, December 30, 2009

I don't wanna be bear food {Part two: The Mental Evaluation}

You wanna know when you SHOULDN'T buy a particular house?

When you think "Hey, I would never in my right mind be able to live here...but it would be great material for the blog!"

*slaps self*

Self, are you frackin' retarded?

Srsly, why? Why would I ever think that was okay?

"Oh let's buy this house and document all the crazy eff'd up shenanigans that are sure to ensue."

Am I drunk? On drugs? Suicidal?

No, maybe its the cabin fever setting in.

Which leads to my next question...
if I've already got cabin fever, why would I want to move to a cabin!?

Sure, the idea of living out in "the country" with our little herb garden and wood heated hot tub, sounds all picturesque and adorable...  in the summer. But I am pretty sure that house is under 10 feet of freakin' snow right now. Being trapped in the wilderness sounds like a blasty blast to me.*rolls eyes*

Dan and I were discussing it, and looking at the online listing and suddenly it hit me like a flying race car tire to the face...

There is no freakin' POTTY!

Noooooo indoor pooper.

That just sealed the "no frackin way" deal!

Not no way, not no how!
(Yea, I was just watching the Wizard of Oz. Don't hate.)

[yea it looks all cozy, but what you don't realize is
those bushes are so people don't see you pee'ing outside.]

I mean, maybe if there were trees I would consider it.


Or maybe not.

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